Simon says.... What???

COMMUNICATION made simple!

Remember the game "Simon Says" that we played as kids?

Simon says- close your eyes.
Simon says- open your eyes.
Simon says- raise your right hand.
Put your right hand down.

If you put your right hand down, you lost and were out of the game.  Why?   Because the rules declare that you should only obey commands that begin with "Simon says."
But what if they said "Simon said"?  Or what if they said "Sliming says"
Would you hesitate?  Would you question if you heard right and if you should obey?
Of course!  Because you are a good listener and you want to WIN!  You didn't have to be threatened to obey.  You tried hard to obey because it was a fun game and you really wanted to WIN!
 
The same childhood game can be used as we train our dogs.
I hear dog owners all the time telling their dog "Sit. Sit down.  Come on.  You can do this.  Do you want a treat?  Sit down."
Or even more often I hear "Sit... Sit..... Sit.... Sit..... Sit..... Sit"

So let me ask you a question... what is your command for SIT?  Is it "3 sits" and a "sit down."?  Or is it "do you want a cookie?" or is it "Come on, sit for mommy."?

And what are the rules of the game?  If the dog sits, what happens?  And if he doesn't sit, what happens?
Oh wait- there are rules???  YES!  Absolutely!  And dogs desperately want to know what they are.  And you are confusing the heck out of them because you don't have any rules!

Here is a simple formula to follow for CLEAR, FAIR communication with your dog once he knows what the command means.

1. Say your dog's name to get his attention first and then give the command ONCE in a firm voice.
2.  Look at your dog.  Is he sitting?  Then give him a reward- something he really loves- a treat or toy or lovins.
 If he is not sitting, then give him a consequence.  Depending on your dog's drive, sensitivity and personality, a consequence may be simply turning away or applying leash pressure to direct his body into a sitting position.

It's that simple, People!  The rule is this: Obeying gets rewarded.  Disobeying gets a consequence.
The rule is not that you will repeat, negotiate or change your mind about what you want him to do.

I can't tell you how often I am called to evaluate an "aggressive" dog and when I arrive,  the dog greets me by lunging and barking and growling, and the owner stands there petting the dog and telling him "It's OK."
So you want me to make your dog stop doing something that you are rewarding him for???  Huh???
You can't give a positive response to a negative action.  That is against your own rules!
Whether the command is "Sit" or "Come" or "No bark" the rule needs to be the exact same-
Obey gets a reward.  Disobey gets a consequence.  How confusing is it to a dog who is being scolded for barking, but is being petted all the while he's barking?  That's so confusing to me it makes my head hurt!


I also think that social pressure some times makes us feel guilty and that for the sake of the those watching, we need to have a preschool level conversation with our dogs in our best puppy wuppy shmooshy punkin face voice, otherwise people will think we are being unkind.  You know what is unkind???  INCONSISTENCY!
When we drop our authority and become wishy washy, we lose our dog's trust. When we are too insecure to give a direct command that is easy to understand and follow, we are doing our dogs a HUGE disservice and diminishing their ability and drive to please us and WIN the game!

If you are guilty of negotiating instead of allowing your dog to win the game by obeying, it may take a bit to turn that bus around.  But you can!  Starting today- go get your leash and a hand full of hot dogs and play the obedience game.  Teach your dog the rules clearly so he can WIN!  It's a simple game he will love when YOU learn how to play FAIRLY!

Simon says GO TRAIN YOUR DOG!

BRINGING BABY HOME TO DOG

I normally try to use humor to make K9 training education more fun.  But there is nothing funny when reading a news article about a newborn baby killed by the family dog.  So I am moved to write seriously this time-

We see social media posts constantly of young children sharing personal space with the "fur baby" and almost feel pressured to make it happen so we, too, can catch that "awwwww" moment.  But far too often, it becomes the "OH NO!" moment.  

If we learn anything from dogs themselves, it's that our young are to be revered and respected.  Even the kindest, gentlest mother dog can become fiercely protective when she has pups and we need to take a cue from her.

I believe we have been mislead to think that we need to introduce the family dog to the new baby and show him his "new brother" A.S.A.P.   We share the baby with the dog in hopes of creating a joyous sibling relationship.  I will be the first to say, that in many cases, there is not a problem in doing this, but why take a chance? Why roll the dice with a tiny new life? Why not be extra careful and present your precious new child as something to be highly respected?

When bringing home your baby, your first course of action is to teach the dog to respect your baby's personal space.  Demand that he give distance!  If you can not make your dog stay away from your baby, you can not control nor predict the way your dog interacts with your baby.

Be proactive.  

Before baby ever comes home, teach your dog the commands "Leave it!"  and "Out!"

You can use whatever words you choose, but you need to be able to communicate that some things and some places are off limits.

You can practice these behaviors by walking into a room and not allowing the dog to follow you.  Turn and send him back.  ("OUT!")

You should also be able to place something on the floor, and tell your dog to leave it alone. ("Leave it!")  He should be respectful and obedient to the point of volunteering to move away, not just resisting temptation.

Remember that dogs can smell things from miles away.  They can surely investigate your new baby by using their nose from far across the room or out in the hallway.  They do not have to lick or press their muzzles into the object or carry it off in their mouth to gather information about what it is.

If you are not able to accomplish these simple behaviors, you need to enlist the help of a professional, no nonsense trainer who can help you establish rules.  If you can not enforce boundaries and off limits, your baby is at risk.

By setting these types of expectations early, your dog will understand his place in the family pack. Teaching him to leave the baby alone, will also be helpful in the future when you have a toddler walking around with Cheerios stuck to his forehead.

Once your baby is home, think of him as WET PAINT!  Stay back and do not touch!  It's totally fine for the dog to be around and be interested, but he needs to give space and stay out of the baby's business.  You can practice this by presenting your dog with something personal that belongs to your baby- a blanket, a diaper, a shirt.

Sit in a chair at your dog's height and let him see and smell it, but NO TOUCHING!  Give lots of praise for being interested, but respectful.  We also don't want to create a jealousy situation, so spending time in training sessions, will assure that your dog doesn't feel replaced. 

 Your dog should feel involved in treasuring the new family member.

It's very important that we don't set the baby up as "FORBIDDEN FRUIT."  We want interaction, but with limitations and reverence.  Your baby will have many interesting smells and your dog will want to investigate, but once again, he needs to keep a respectful attitude and not barge in or insist on contact.

NEVER EVER leave your dog in the room with your baby or young child alone- not even for 10 seconds.  Children far too often accidentally imitate prey animals with their movement and sounds, and curious dogs sometimes instinctively take liberties.  When you leave the room, take either the child or the dog with you.

If you invite your dog to leave the room with you, not only are you being a good supervisor, but this is another way to keep your dog feeling special while you create a safe place for your baby while you are out of the room.

I do dog safety seminars entitled SPAY/NEUTER/TRAIN/SUPERVISE.  In them we emphasize the importance of SPAY/NEUTER to remove the reproductive/competitive hormonal aspect.  Proactive TRAINING establishes rules and leadership. And SUPERVISION is necessary to make sure that a situation never escalates to a dangerous level.  If you would like information on how to book a seminar, please contact me at manestreamtraining@gmail.com.

LEASH those EMOTIONS!

Your dog is a mirror of you.
           .........Or are you a mirror of your dog?

The million dollar question....

    When your dog "freaks out" at the vet, or another dog, or the mailman, how do you respond?  Do you get angry?  Frustrated?  Embarrassed?

    Of course you do!  We ALL do!  Emotions are natural.  They are a gift.  They let us know that we have feelings and are aware of what is going on around us.  But how we respond to our emotions makes all the difference in whether or not we can make a change in our dog's behavior.

    Leaders lead.  Followers follow.  I have people tell me all the time that they are the "Alpha."
Ok,  Sure.
 But then, why do you follow your dog?  When he barks, lunges, whines, jumps- do you get riled up?  Does your blood pressure rise?  Does your heart race?  Does that little vein in your neck pop out?  Do you panic?  Do you yell or wave your arms around like a rabid orangutan?
Then you are NOT the Alpha.  You are not the leader.  You are the follower.  You are mirroring your dog's anxiety.

   Leading our dogs doesn't mean we are the biggest, baddest, or toughest.  In fact it's quite the opposite.  Being the leader means that you determine the direction of the follower- not imitate the follower!

    Which one of us doesn't get really ticked off when the dog chews up something you loved, or leaves a stinky pile of nastiness on your freshly cleaned carpet.  It can be infuriating at times.  But responding or punishing your dog out of anger makes you weak and not trustworthy.  Before you decide what action to take to correct your dog's behavior, take a minute (or twelve) to get control of your emotions.  Use mistakes as an opportunity for teaching.  If you correct your dog with calm authority instead of a Tasmanian rage, he will respect you, not fear you.

    So, when Sir Barksalot acts like a complete fool, don't try to hide your emotions.  That's dumb.  Dogs can see right through fake and lose respect for you.  They want an authentic leader.

Here's a plan:

1. STOP.  Stand up straight. Remember, dogs communicate through body language so if you bend over or start spinning around and panic, you are signaling to your dog that you've lost it as well.

2.  Shorten your leash and reduce your dog's movement.

3.  While your dog continues to freak out, focus your eyes up and away from him.  Take a DEEP cleansing breathe and release all those inner thoughts of  "I'm going to kill you!"  Do not stare at him.  Eye contact is an affirming reward.  You do not want to affirm bad behavior.

4.  BE QUIET!  Yelling at him repeatedly becomes you barking- again imitating his behavior.

5.  Use leash pressure- not your hands- to control your dog's movement.

6.  Make him SIT.  Yeah, that may sound completely impossible.  And it probably is, unless you practice.  A lot.  You will need to practice this ahead of time.  Practice in your house.  Practice in your yard.  Practice in the parking lot at Walmart.  Practice in the pet store.  Practice at the vet.
 Most vets welcome you to come in and work on good behavior- it makes their job much easier.  So give them a call and go in and practice.  Since you are not actually having anything done, it can be an all positive experience for a change.  Winning!

7.  If you do not have the skills to make your dog sit in any situation, you are not the leader- your dog is.  Get some help from a professional trainer or obedience school.

Once you are confident that you are in control, when you get in sticky situations, go to your game plan.  Stay upright.  Stay focused.  Stay calm.  YOU need to act the way you want your dog to act-instead of your dog sucking you into a spinning vortex of stupid!  YOU CAN DO THIS!