We see social media posts constantly of young children sharing personal space with the "fur baby" and almost feel pressured to make it happen so we, too, can catch that "awwwww" moment. But far too often, it becomes the "OH NO!" moment.
If we learn anything from dogs themselves, it's that our young are to be revered and respected. Even the kindest, gentlest mother dog can become fiercely protective when she has pups and we need to take a cue from her.
I believe we have been mislead to think that we need to introduce the family dog to the new baby and show him his "new brother" A.S.A.P. We share the baby with the dog in hopes of creating a joyous sibling relationship. I will be the first to say, that in many cases, there is not a problem in doing this, but why take a chance? Why roll the dice with a tiny new life? Why not be extra careful and present your precious new child as something to be highly respected?
When bringing home your baby, your first course of action is to teach the dog to respect your baby's personal space. Demand that he give distance! If you can not make your dog stay away from your baby, you can not control nor predict the way your dog interacts with your baby.
Be proactive.
Before baby ever comes home, teach your dog the commands "Leave it!" and "Out!"
You can use whatever words you choose, but you need to be able to communicate that some things and some places are off limits.
You can practice these behaviors by walking into a room and not allowing the dog to follow you. Turn and send him back. ("OUT!")
You should also be able to place something on the floor, and tell your dog to leave it alone. ("Leave it!") He should be respectful and obedient to the point of volunteering to move away, not just resisting temptation.
Remember that dogs can smell things from miles away. They can surely investigate your new baby by using their nose from far across the room or out in the hallway. They do not have to lick or press their muzzles into the object or carry it off in their mouth to gather information about what it is.
If you are not able to accomplish these simple behaviors, you need to enlist the help of a professional, no nonsense trainer who can help you establish rules. If you can not enforce boundaries and off limits, your baby is at risk.
By setting these types of expectations early, your dog will understand his place in the family pack. Teaching him to leave the baby alone, will also be helpful in the future when you have a toddler walking around with Cheerios stuck to his forehead.
Once your baby is home, think of him as WET PAINT! Stay back and do not touch! It's totally fine for the dog to be around and be interested, but he needs to give space and stay out of the baby's business. You can practice this by presenting your dog with something personal that belongs to your baby- a blanket, a diaper, a shirt.
Sit in a chair at your dog's height and let him see and smell it, but NO TOUCHING! Give lots of praise for being interested, but respectful. We also don't want to create a jealousy situation, so spending time in training sessions, will assure that your dog doesn't feel replaced.
Your dog should feel involved in treasuring the new family member.
It's very important that we don't set the baby up as "FORBIDDEN FRUIT." We want interaction, but with limitations and reverence. Your baby will have many interesting smells and your dog will want to investigate, but once again, he needs to keep a respectful attitude and not barge in or insist on contact.
NEVER EVER leave your dog in the room with your baby or young child alone- not even for 10 seconds. Children far too often accidentally imitate prey animals with their movement and sounds, and curious dogs sometimes instinctively take liberties. When you leave the room, take either the child or the dog with you.
If you invite your dog to leave the room with you, not only are you being a good supervisor, but this is another way to keep your dog feeling special while you create a safe place for your baby while you are out of the room.
I do dog safety seminars entitled SPAY/NEUTER/TRAIN/SUPERVISE. In them we emphasize the importance of SPAY/NEUTER to remove the reproductive/competitive hormonal aspect. Proactive TRAINING establishes rules and leadership. And SUPERVISION is necessary to make sure that a situation never escalates to a dangerous level. If you would like information on how to book a seminar, please contact me at manestreamtraining@gmail.com.
