Silence is Golden

So, while you are trying to read a text message, or count your money, or find an address, someone is talking non-stop to you.  How does that make you feel???  Probably want to scream SHUT UP!!!  I'M TRYING TO THINK!  Right?!?!?!
     So, why do we constantly talk AT our dogs?  We take them to the vet, or somebody passes them on the street pushing a stroller, or the garbage man slams the empty cans down and our dogs immediately show concern and are on full alert.
     PROBLEM: As human beings, we have a bad habit of trying to explain everything to them.  "It's OK, Buddy, you just have to get a shot- it will only hurt for a second and then Mommy's gonna take you to Dairy Queen and get your favorite ice cream!  Or do you wanna go with Mommy to the Pet Store and pick out a bone, You wanna do that, Buddy?!? Huh?  You wanna get a new toy?  Huh, Buddy???  Mommy will get you a new toy....."  
   Meanwhile Buddy is wishing you would shut the heck up so he could concentrate on the smells and sounds around him and process what this all is about.  He needs you to be calm and quiet and set an example of confidence by using your body language and calm positive energy.  When he is allowed time to log information into his brain about his surroundings, it builds on the experience for next time.  If you are a good, confident leader, he will triumph even through bad things knowing that you were always in control of him and his situation.
   Being aware of our surroundings and using our body to tell our dogs that everything is OK, is the most powerful thing we can do.  It doesn't matter how many hundreds of words you try to comfort them with, if your own emotion is one of concern- that's what your dog will associate with the situation- even if your concern is for him.  All he knows is that you are worried and so he will follow suit and become worried.  In another blog we will explore the damage done when we pet and praise our dogs when they are behaving inappropriately-
    SOLUTION:  Try these 3 exercises... 
1.  Move your dog around the room using only your body.  Call him to you by smiling brightly and and lifting your eyebrows and bending over and patting your legs.  BE SILENT!  It's HARD to do, but so good for both of you!
2.  Now take it to the streets- Get your leash and (silently) attach it to your dog and walk energetically out to your yard as though Santa Claus himself is awaiting him with a bag full of T Bone Steaks.  Without saying a word, notice if your dog begins to look around anxiously anticipating something wonderful.  He will, once you both learn to get back to basics.  Body language.
   Here's part 3 of your homework:  With your dog on leash, walk through your house and then come to a complete stop.  Without telling your dog to sit or saying a single word, stand still as though your batteries had just gone dead.  Don't pull the leash.  Don't correct or control him.  Don't make eye contact with your dog.  Just stand there like you're in the line at the DMV.  Lean against a wall and breathe deeply and completely relax.  See how long it takes for your dog to sit down or lay down and wait.
   When you can do these exercises successfully, you will have tapped into the amazingly complicated, but profoundly simple language of the dog!
   MEMORY LESSON: HE DOESN'T NEED YOU TO EXPLAIN, HE NEEDS YOU TO LEAD!